Archive for the ‘under attack!’ Category

Ray Comfort (Awesome) invents Mothball Mobile

June 3, 2019

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DISCERNMENTALIST WOO NEWS—  Kearny is one of those towns with a main street called Kearny Avenue. Most Friday and Saturday nights Ray Comfort (Awesome) would walk Kearny Avenue passing out “Are you a good person?” tracts to groups of young people and feminists. Most of them would laugh at him. Some ridiculed him. A few even assaulted him. But Ray was undeterred. He wanted to be able to connect with some of these kids and preach the law of our Angry God’s wrath to them. Then it dawned on him since feminists (under Mothra’s influence) fear mothballs—why not invent a Mothball Mobile (using recently discovered Mothball technology)—then he could safely pick kids up on Sunday morning—(protected from Mothra and feminist doctrines) in his Mothball Mobile and bring them to church. If the kids are poor Ray would then have the opportunity to preach the Gospel of Capitalism to them so they could be saved through the “invisible hand” of Free-Market economics. Online Discernmentalist ministries are now seeing the benefits of this application of our newly discovered Mothball technology with Ray’s invention we can now more often load up our cars with kids and take them to see Discernmentalist approved movies and bring them to Discernmentalist crusades. Even with all his eccentricity—Ray lives the commands of Christ through merciful grace as well as any redeemed Elect can by preaching the Law and Wrath of God’s anger instead of mercy and grace to sinners. (Source)

Mrs. Jobson is extra excited to hear the good news that our good friend Ray Comfort is inventing this Mothball mobile as she hasn’t been allowed to leave our bunker in months without wearing her mothball necklace for protection—ever-since these Mothra feminist attacks have begun upon the Holy Remnant within our apostate Southern Baptist Convention. We fear that ever-since these feminist priestesses started invading our SBC—that they will return our beloved Convention to the Dark Ages of liberals and the unholy horrors of Progress by divine fiat. We’d like to thank Ray once again for inventing this as the extra protection of mothballs will keep us well-fortified on the go—and safe from being accosted by Mothra or any other strange feminists—while we’re out and about. Now Mrs. Jobson and our Quiverfull of kids will safely be able to see God Is Not Dead: The Finally Final Reckoning when it finally comes out!

 

Don Jobson and Mrs. Jobson through being forced to agree with me approves

 

A New PSA Message from Our Conspiracy-Driven Church!:

May 22, 2019

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FEAR… ANGER… HATRED… AGRESSION… SUFFERING….

Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”—John Howard Yoder

“Together, these elements helped create a society in which many Americans see millions of snares, laid by a menacing group of enemies, all the more alarming for how difficult they are to identify and pin down.

Let’s pause to attempt to define a conspiracy theory. It is a belief that a small group of people are working in secret against the common good, to create harm, to effect some negative change in society, to seize power for themselves, or to hide some deadly or consequential secret. An actual conspiracy is when a small group of people are working in secret against the common good – and anyone who tells you we can always easily distinguish fictitious plots from real ones probably hasn’t read much history.

Conspiracy theories tend to flourish especially at times of rapid social change, when we are re-evaluating ourselves and, perhaps, facing uncomfortable questions in the process. In 1980, the civil liberties lawyer and author Frank Donner wrote that conspiracism reveals a fundamental insecurity about who Americans want to be versus who they are.” (Source)

We Discernmentalists are Conspiracy Theory-addicts—the more unbelievable the conspiracy the better to defend our Truth with. If your church teaches social justice—say George Soros is funding this teaching even-though it is in the Bible and Church History. Social Justice sounds too much like Socialism. If your Preacher preaches that God is love and loves the world—accuse him of preaching Universalist heresy among other heresies. Thankfully we Discernmentalists can find a conspiracy to suit our every need. We love our tin-foil hats and we love to keep them on extra tight.

And remember Conspiracy theories are I. Todyaso backed…Truthslayer and Don Jobson approved

 

Blocked By One Of Our Own

May 9, 2019

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The attacks on us by our former allies the formerly known Propaganda & Party (Pulpit & Pen) now henceforth known as Bulpit & Pen have taken a turn for the worse and have gotten extra ugly. Recently our Mighty notTwitter Truth Warriors were blocked. Yes blocked— Bulpit & Pen blocked us from spying on following them on their Socialist Media account on Twitter—after discovering Dr. Truthslayer’s helpful meme. We are beyond outraged—for one: how dare they go against our Clear Teachings that even we ourselves don’t follow on Social Media leading to Socializing which is sheer worldliness and even worse Socialism. We thought they were much more anti-Social Gospel than that.

Even moreso Bulpit & Pen have turned their missives on our newest ally in protecting the fragile Hard Truth of our Glorious Pope John MacArthur’s Truth War (PBUI):

  1. Do not post memes.

  2. Do not post Babylon Bee articles.

We have even more reason to be concerned that Bulpit & Pen are apostatizing from the worldly means in which all True Truth Warriors fighting the good fight against for Truth wage our Truth War©2007®™ . What would our mutual Pope John MacArthur (PBUH)’s right hand man Phil Johnson aka Hugh Jass think or the Mighty Truth Warrior Frank Turk? We only pray that Bulpit & Pen repent and turn back to the fold of fighting the good Truth War for our mutual Pope John MacArthur’s Absolute Truth©2007®™ .

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Blessed Are The Peacekeepers!

April 29, 2019

Blessed are the Peacekeepers missiles which were personally blessed by pagan American Jesus. Blessed are they who are consistently so Pro-Life it kills. Blessed are they who call for more war an end to war. Blessed are they that sew division through hate unity through love. Blessed are they who hate love their enemies. Blessed are they who hold true to Christian American values. Blessed are the peacemakers warmongers who sew war where there is no war peace where there is no peace.

More on Our Persecution

April 23, 2019

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Once again my fellow Truth Warriors in our war on Truth War we’ve come under assault. This time by the sinfully ecumenical quasi-universalist semi-pelagian worldly heretical mystic seeker sensitive purpose driven Emergence unchristian against our clear teachings against such Relevant Magazine for writing an article against our Persecution Complex fake Real Persecution. Quote:

Obama was now, according to one Brietbart reporter, one of those “people who don’t want to say ‘Christians’”. “Yeah we’re actually called Christians not ‘Easter worshippers’”, sniffed a National Review writer. And so the sneaking conspiracy spread.

This is one of those “scandals” that becomes absurd as soon as you say it aloud. The charge is that former President Obama must hate Christianity so much he can’t even bring himself to say the word out loud. Such a rare form of psychological loathing that would be very surprising coming from a man who, say, famously sang “Amazing Grace” at a memorial service for Christians who were murdered in his own country while he was President.

Referring to people attending a religious service as “worshippers” is standard practice. It was only a few days ago that the AP called those mourning the closure of the Notre Dame Cathedral as “Easter Worshippers.”

How dare they take a stand against  our persecution for taking a stand against all those who would dare call Easter worshippers True Christians against our clear teachings that such is an abomination! We must reunite again in our war on Truth Truth War to come against all those who would dare come against us and be ever apprising on those who pervert our True Doctrines. Quote:

There’s a whole cottage industry built up around this complex — the God’s Not Dead franchise springs to mind — and it ends up doing real damage to Christians in other countries who are facing actual, not imagined, persecution. When American Christians cry wolf about actual persecution enough, the real thing ends up getting ignored.

And that’s the sad irony here. What happened in Sri Lanka is a true example of believers being targeted for their religious beliefs, while American Christians took a statement of seeming sincerity as a perceived slight and obfuscated the real persecution. If Christians truly care about persecution, they will mourn the real thing, not create fake versions of it.

But our Pope of our war on postmodernity Truth War (PBUH) says:

In this era of religious pluralism and postmodern relativism, evangelical Christianity has been marginalized as too rigid and too exclusive for public consumption. In the same way, the first-century church was a direct contradiction, not just of Jewish teaching, but of Roman paganism, as well. John MacArthur explains how the New Testament Christian’s life contradicted the religious norms of life in Roman society.

Because the Christians refused to make the required sacrifice offered in worship to the emperor, they were seen as traitors. They also proclaimed the kingdom of God, which caused the Romans to suspect them of plotting to overthrow the government. To avoid harassment by government officials, Christians often held their meetings in secret and at night. That heightened the Romans’ suspicions that they were hatching an anti-government plot. That Christians generally refused to serve in the Roman army also caused them to be viewed as disloyal.

The Romans also persecuted Christians for religious reasons. They allowed their subjects to worship whatever gods they liked, as long as they also worshiped the Roman gods. But Christians preached an exclusive message that there is only one God and only one way of salvation. That, coupled with their evangelistic efforts to win converts from other religions, went against the prevailing atmosphere of religious pluralism. [3] The MacArthur New Testament Commentary: John 12-21, 167-168.

The world doesn’t often clearly delineate religious lines of demarcation. To the untrained eye, most “Christian” religions look vaguely similar. And so long as the various religions can get along with one another—regardless of their differences—the world is happy to tolerate their faith and practice. Look no further than the widespread ecumenical support for this latest pope, or the constant campaign to rebrand Islam as a religion of peace as evidence of the world’s preference for postmodern religious harmony.

It’s only when God’s people make a stand for the objective, eternal truth of His Word that they find themselves in the crosshairs of an otherwise tolerant society. The message is clear: If you could just take your faith less seriously, we’d be able to get along. But the inability of God’s truth to mix with error means God’s people will always be branded as the problem children.

So who  you gonna believe us or them? So take a stand in our Conspiracy Driven Church and spread the fear and spread the hate against all those liberal sinners who said something we don’t like and hurt our feelings went against our God who is a good liberal-hating Obanma/Hillary-bashing Republican just like us because we’re so persecuted.

Facebook Is Persecuting Us!

April 23, 2019

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Breaking Truth War News: Facebook is persecuting us. Facebook has blocked me from sharing my Blog posts and not letting me share my hate love speech with everybody on Facebook. I feel so persecuted that I just had to write a post to show just how persecuted we are for our Facebook followers. My fellow Truth Warriors Dr. I.Todyaso and Dr. Truthslayer can attest to how persecuted we are. I feel outraged and personally threatened by the intolerant librul fascism of Facebook. Why must they harass us for standing on the Hard Truths of the Bible? Why is lamestream media silent on our plight? I liken my suffering to all those Christian martyrs suffering persecution elsewhere in the world. Please help us in our good fight against persecution and the intolerance of Facebook by liking the ODMafia and GOIP pages on Facebook where you can read more posts about how persecuted we are. Each new like supports us in our cause against intolerance and persecution.

Pope Pyro the First says: “Education Smeducation!”

April 20, 2019

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Our Illustrious Infallible Grand Poobah the Most Inerrant Most Holy Pope Pyro I aka John MacArthur (PBUH) decrees: “Education smeducation…students keep your mouth shut…I am the Master and you barely worthy to sit at my anointed feet of discernmentalism…I have no need of degrees as  I already know all Truth. Did Paul have a  degree? Did Spurgeon? For I was personally appointed by God to lead the Truth War and spread disimformation slander discernmentalism. I know all Truth and history as I was there.”

Elsewhere Phil Johnson aka Hugh Jass noted that our Holy mecca Vatican school University of Discernmentalism is under attack:

Pastor John MacArthur has described the probation of his Master’s University and Seminary by an accrediting agency as an “orchestrated” attack, possibly by Satan, and directed students to keep quiet about the controversy.

A Nov. 29 report from the Chronicle of Higher Education published an audio recording of an hourlong sermon from August wherein the 79-year-old Reformed pastor told the student body that their accreditor’s actions amounted to an effort “orchestrated, if not by humans, by Satan himself.”

MacArthur also told students not to ask questions about the accreditation issues, they had no right to learn the details, and that it was not their responsibility.

“There are things that God hates, right?” he said, referencing Proverbs 6. “One of them is the one who stirs up strife,” he said, urging students to keep their complaints within the university and seminary.

“Keep your mouth shut,” MacArthur told them.

“Don’t stir up strife. You don’t know the whole story.”

Phoenix Considers ‘Sin Tax’ On Young, Restless & Reformed Churches

April 18, 2019

(From the front-lines of the Truth War)- Frequenters of Phoenix strip clubs aka Young, Restless & Reformed Church-goers might be paying a little more than usual in the future. That’s because of a potential “sin tax,” first proposed to the city government by John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) on Tuesday. The tax would be imposed on establishments including strip club, tattoo parlors, and escort services, and other places that the Young, Restless & Reformed Movement (YRR) frequent to hold their “church” services reported Phil Johnson of Hugh Jass News.

Our Research Robot Monkeys reached YRR Guru Mark Driscoll of Mars Hill Church for comment on this proposal—he said: “Rats….garbled language….*censored for filthy language*….now I may not be able to continue practicing my Pornographic Divination.”

Typical YRR heathen response: “Smoking and drinking are so much cooler than obeying the rules against such in the bible given to us by the Sovereign decrees of our God of wrath. Besides Spurgeon was a Christian hedonist too so he would be cool with us smoking doobies; drinking hooch and using locker room talk to prove how much cooler than our Ruling Elders and more countercultural than carnal Pagan we are.” Nonsense. That’s why we must be ever discernmentalizing and concernmentalizing. The Truth War still rages on.

Smells like ‘Emergent Spirit!’

April 18, 2019

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Don’t be shocked when many “Christians” cheer the criminalization of Christianity. The number of supposedly Christian individuals whose moral compasses are calibrated to the spirit of the age rather than the authority of scripture has become astounding. 

The Emergent spirit

of this age includes:

 

  1. Attacks on the Bible’s words about CAPTALISM
  2. Ignorance of the Reformers’ PRO-CAPITALIST VIEWS
  3. Insistence on helping the poor
  4. Support of Pro-Abortionism
  5. Anti-War views/Unpatriotic behavior
  6. Anti-American Nationalism views
  7. A Pro-Social Justice bent
  8. Support of the gay agenda aka Sodomy
  9. Religious Liberty for non-Orthodox Calvinists
  10. Views against discernmentalists’ judgmentalism 

Amongst other things that are anathema to our Truth War Doctrines. 5

But most importantly this Emergent spirit is against our most Godly; Holy and Biblical President ever—-this is why we must take a stand against  them in our God’s Great Wrath and Pure Doctrines by renewing our Christian Liberty to subjugate; discriminate and persecute those against our Doctrine.

We Support Religious Liberty!

October 5, 2011

Why support Religious Liberty and the Separation of Church and State when you can do the complete opposite! Support us and our Alliance Defense Fund.

We stand for “real” Religious Liberty:

Among other “Religious Liberty” issues.  * – And by Christians, we mean only those who hold to a Strict interpretation of Orthodox 5-point Dortian Calvinism. Since Mary-worshipping Papists, Arminianist free-will idolaters, Lutherans, anaBaptists, Greeks and other non-Reformed churches are Semi-Pelagian, they are all non-Christian religions—because they reject the “True Gospel.”

We “poor” Christian majority are tired of being  discriminated against in our own Country—remember this Great Nation was founded upon “Christian principles” and that all of our Founding Fathers were “good Bible-Believing Calvinists” especially Thomas Jefferson and James Madison. It’s time we do something and take back our Religious Liberty: to spread more Partisan politics and hate.

For decades, the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) and other radical anti-Christian groups have been on a mission to eliminate public expression of our nation’s faith and heritage. By influencing the government, filing lawsuits, and spreading the myth of the so-called “separation of church and state,” the opposition has been successful at forcing its leftist agenda on Americans.

Their targeted attacks on religious freedom are more serious and widespread than you may realize. In courtrooms and schoolrooms, offices and shops, public buildings and even churches…those who believe in God are increasingly threatened, punished, and silenced.

Help us take a stand for “true” Religious Liberty and support God’s Only Inerrant Party in 2012: vote Brannon Howse/Michael Reagan!

(Issac Backus and Roger Williams be damned!)