Archive for the ‘Scientology’ Category

Discernmentalists Detect High Concentrations Of Gaydiation

January 22, 2010

Recently Discernmentalists have noticed high concentrations of Gayons around Canada, New York and Southern California. These findings are indeed disturbing but not surprising. Top GOIP scientists are hard at work on constructing an Anti-Gaydiation sheild against these gayons to protect our Pure Biblical Marriage Doctrines. In the meantime, we promise to locate every gay person we can and kick them out of our Pure Churches. Afterall, all gays are pedophiles and that’s just wrong. Besides would you want one of these sitting beside you in church?

We think not that’s why we promise to do all the thinking for you—so remember to spread the fear and hate.

Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer Discernmentalizes Crime And Military Towns

November 20, 2009

11-17-2009 @ 1:06PM

Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer said…

I also would not put stock in this story. They are talking about “Military towns.” San Antonio has over a million people, but in the story, and in the San Antonio picture, they outline an area that is NOT a military area, with a stated population of a little of 2,000. Yes it is not a great part of town, but it is several miles away from Lackland AFB, and has NOTHING to do with it. Even in the story, the idiot author wrote “an area near Texas’ Lackland AFB.” What city of over 1 million people does not have a high crime area? STUPID, STUPID STORY!!!!

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[H/T] Daily Finance

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Brannon Howse Caught Making Anti-Christian Hand Signals And Gestures

November 9, 2009

brannonhowseexposed

Overlayed photos taken by GOIP Bot 3000 in conjunction with GOIP Eye 3

In a recent GOIPview Weekend rally our GOIP Bot 3000 in conjunction with GOIP Eye 3 caught Brannon Howse making Anti-Christian hand signals and gestures during his speech. Here are the incriminating images which speak for themselves:

Brannon-Howse-speaks-at-Worldview-Conference

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Zoomed in for Absolute Clarity and Absolute Proof:

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True Christian Hand Signals And Gestures:

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point

Codename ACSBLOP *(Augustine Calvin Spurgeon Black Letters of Paul)* Unveiled

November 6, 2009

GOIPSHEALDILogo

Introducing The Strategic Heretical Emergent Arminian & Liberal Defense Initiative or (SHEALDI) for short otherwise known as Codename ACSBLOP *(Augustine Calvin Spurgeon Black Letters of Paul)* or also known by it’s better known nickname ‘Heresy Wars/Absolute Truth Wars‘—now available and on the market from GOIP Labs. This top secret project has been in the making for several years now. Here is our Political Messiah, Final President and the Last Real President, Ronald Reagan with myself (Don Jobson) going over our top secret plans:

donjobsonwithronaldreagan

Final President Reagan with myself about to deliver the March 23, 1983 speech initiating SHEALDI. I was 19 years old then.

[Editors’ note: You’ve heard of those heathen Sedevacantists—well, we are Sedewhitehousists, because Jesus believed in the political gospel of Reaganism otherwise known as Reaganomics and elected Regan the last Political Messiah for God’s Chosen and Ordained Nation that’s why we belong to the FCCSORR (Fundamentalist Calvinist Christian Society Of Ronald Reagan).]

Anyways, part of our plan is to fire Missives packed full of the Pure Doctrines of Saint Augustine and our Final Prophet John Calvin, the Pure Sermons of Charles Spurgeon and the words of Paul directly into our comments as a ‘preemptive strike’ against Emergent attacks on our Absolute Truth comments—and for those times when those evil Emergents  hijack our comments by inserting heretical, communist or other non-Christian words such as ‘comrade’  into our comments to make it look as if we aren’t truly regenerate and of God’s True Elect.

KenSilvaSpurgeonMissive

A Ken Silva Approved Spurgeon Missive.

Here is the genius part of our glorious plan—once these Missives are shot off they will provide a  web of Absolute Truth protection cover over all of us Discernmentalists to keep all of our Absolute Truth comments safe and Pure:

AbsoluteTruthMissivenet

Absolute Truth Mighty Fortress Missive Net packed full of Augustine, Calvin, Spurgeon and the Black Letters of Paul.

In case ye are wondering what the texts of our net say because ye are unregenerate—they read:

1 Timothy 2:10-15 (King James Version)

 10But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

 11Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.

 12But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

 13For Adam was first formed, then Eve.

 14And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.

 15Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

1 Corinthians 6:9-10 (King James Version)

 9Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

 10Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

God’s Wrath on Unrighteousness

18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. 19 For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. 20 For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. 21 For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22 Claiming to be wise, they became fools, 23 and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things.

24 Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, 25 because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.

26 For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; 27 and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.—Romans 1:18-27 ESV.

Ephesians 5:22-24 (King James Version)

 22Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.

 24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

 That is the ACSBLOP or Appostate attacks on our Absolute Truth Comments Sheild-BLOcking Program part of our SHEALDI project—the other part includes our Space Laser Program otherwise known as DPDEWW or Direct Pure Doctrines Energy Wave Weapon. Here is a photo taken from GOIP Eye 2 which we thankfully retrieved before those evil Emergents blew up GOIP Eye 2:

Direct Pure Doctrines Energy Wave Weapon

* In case ye are spiritually blind the bottom reads: All Discernmentalists and their Absolute Truth comments saved from the attacks upon us being waged across the world by all of our enemies—those unbelieving heathens–especially those evil Emergents.

DPDEWW  operates by a GOIP MIRACL beam director–pictured below:

goipmiracl

Me operating DPDEWW.

DPDEWW also runs on Sound Doctrine Indicating Operative technology which is also called Laser Operating Apostate Chaser Enhanced Engine or SDIO-LOACEE for short. Here we are putting the finishing touches on our SDIO-LOACEE:

SDIO-LOACEE

Dr. I. Todyaso and Will Farel XV assist me in the preparation of our SDIO-LOACEE.

Another part of our industrious project  is the Emergent Reflector Sound Doctrine Missive Impure Doctrines Deflector or ERSDMIDD. Here is a picture of how ERSDMIDD works:

ERSDMIDD

ERSDMIDD takes Emergent and impure doctrines and beams  them back at our enemies while also leaving our Sound Doctrines Pure. It also beams Sound Doctrines directly into our enemies’ brains in a last attemptive effort of teaching them our ways the Absolute Truth. Another of our Missives that runs on Sound Doctrine Indicating Operative (SDIO) technology is our SDIO-Delta Star or our SDIO Missive Emegent-cy Defense System. Here Ken Silva fires off one of our SDIO-Delta Star missives SDIO-Delta Star II ironically codenamed ‘Ken Silva:’

sdiodeltastar2-kensilva

GOIP Missive Defense Against antichrists and apostate Christians.

The main part of SHEALDI is our Satellite Defense Network to prevent  evil Emergent signals from crossing streams with our Pure signal streams and hijacking our Absolute Truth comments. Here is our SHEALDI Satellite Defense Network at work:

SHEALDI Satellite Network

The results are shown below:

SHEALDIdamage

Putting together all of our complex and convoluted simple project—you’ll never have to worry about evil Emergents hijacking and hacking into your Pure Absolute Truth comments by inserting heretical, communist or other non-Christian words into them such as ‘comrade’ ever again.

Before SHEALDI:

EmergentHijackedComment

The recent Emergent attack on Truthslayer’s computer by hijacking his comment to me and inserting a communist word into it to make it look as if he isn’t truly regenerate and of God’s True Elect as he “didn’t write ‘comrade’ as a matter of fact that word does not exist in (our) discernmentalist dictionary.”

After SHEALDI:

SHEALDIfiedComment

What things will be like from now on now that we have initiated SHEALDI  on all of our and our fellow Discernmentalists’ computers.

And that is all:

Recording of the applause from the recent Convention of Discernmentalists after SHEALDI was unveiled and set up by GOIP Labs.

Evil Emergent Plots Found

November 5, 2009

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Recently you may recall that Ken Silva was caught in another scandal. Well we have  found that to be  false and upon further discernmentalizing have concluded that the Ken Silva in the video singing “worldly music” just last year which promotes “trance formational dancing” is actually an evil Doppelganger twin of Ken planted by Emergents to mock our Pure Doctrines.

In other news GOIP Eye 2 was shot down by Rob Bell, Doug Pagitt and their heretical crew of Emergent miscreants. Here  is the view captured from GOIP Eye 1:

GOIPEye2mistywithemergentconfusion

Just look at that mystical web of  Emergent confusion surrounding our once lovely rocket satellite! GOIP Eye 3 caught the moment of impact when GOIP Eye 2 exploded:

GOIPEye2Exploding

The Face Of Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer Revealed

November 4, 2009

TyroneV.Hoofendorfer

Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer, Guardian of Truth.

Our GOIP Bot 3000 has been busy at work as of  late. Today it was set on researchmentalist mode for 5 hours when all of a sudden a picture of our very own Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer, GOIP Sturmabteilung Minister Of  The Truth War On Scientology and avid gay basher emerged. Quite frankly we were stunned that his secret identity leaked on the web. Afterall it is a rule for Online Discernmentalists to keep their identities secret. This is just like that time when

 a picture of Ken Silva emerged on the internet which we thing was an evil plot devised by Tony Jones and Doug Pagitt. Fortunately we were able to intercept the picture and distort the image of Ken Silva in his secret lair. Ken, you can thank the ODMafia for keeping you secret identity from being known.

Unfortunately this time we were unable to intercept the picture and distort the image to preserve Hoofendorfer’s anonymity and secret identity which is why the picture is left as is. We have reason to suspect that Rob Bell and Rick Warren planted this image on the net to expose and mock our Pure Doctrines. Tis the way of those Seeker-driven Emergents—evil plotters they all are. And yet another image leaked of Hoofendorfer with some of his and our fellow Truth Warriors:

T.V.HoofendorferwithNaziZombieTruthWarriors

Death To Socialism

November 2, 2009

briannocommies

Our GOIP Bot 3000 has just discernmentalized a wonderful list outlining some of our Master Plan—here it is:

  1. End Medicaid, Medicare and the VA. This was a liberal plan to simply redistribute wealth from the rich to the needy. These plans are both expensive and unsustainable and the time is now to cut the plug. If you are elderly or a veteran, then you are on your own. If you have enough wealth, then go get your own health plan. However if you cannot afford a health plan, then consider yourself a leach on society. You are dragging down this great country.
  2. End Public Schools. Obama just got on television and delivered a message to all the children in public schools in the nation. How wrong is that? The president has no business talking to our children. All he wants to do is spread his liberal agenda to their innocent minds. There is only one solution to all of this. All children should be home schooled. Also the wealthy can send their children to expensive private schools, but the inexpensive public schools are just a burden on society.
  3. End Unemployment Insurance. Unemployment insurance is just wrong. It is redistribution of wealth in its purest form. I am supposed to give my hard earned tax money to some retard that can’t even hold a job? Give me a break. They can always get a job at McDonald’s or picking up the trash. This is just a way of rewarding laziness, and it needs to come to a full stop, now!
  4. Private Roads. Where in the constitution does it say that our government is responsible for creating roads? No where. All roads should be private, and the better road the more it should cost. There are plenty of poor people that may not be able to afford to travel on the better roads, and I have one response. Tough crap! Now that you don’t have unemployment insurance, maybe you will have more motivation to finally get a job.
  5. End Air Traffic Control. Do we really need our government controlling our air ways? The entire system is probably corrupt, and should be eliminated. Liberals will argue that air traffic control makes air travel safer. How stupid! All it does it drives up the cost. We need to make air travel more affordable and the first step is eliminating air traffic control.
  6. Burn Down All The Libraries. I know one thing for sure. Libraries would not exist if not for liberals. Now that Obama’s approval ratings are falling off a cliff, let’s get rid of one of the bastions of liberalism, libraries. That will show them. If people want to read, then they can buy their own books. Why can’t liberals understand that simple fact?
  7. No More Taxes. The beautiful part of my plan is that we no longer need to pay taxes. Even some good conservative people like to read a good book once in a while, but is it really worth our freedom? I for one am going to stop paying taxes immediately and then hopefully the Chosen One, Barack Hussein Obama, will follow my simple plan to eliminate socialism in our lifetime. I encourage all my readers to stop paying taxes as a protest to socialism.

Young-Socialist-1905

We  would also like to add in outlawing Sunday School as Sunday School is a communist plot to decieve God’s True Elect into accepting socialism—for Sunday School was invented by ‘Robert Raikes, editor of the Gloucester Journal and (a theological liebral), who saw the need to prevent children in the slums descending into crime.’  This is nothing but the false gospel of socialism and ‘that old line of liberalism’ otherwise known as the Social Gospel as Saint John MacArthur clearly exposes:

We also plan on making Fundamentalist Calvinistic Christianity the only legalized religion and all others illegal.

Boycott Disney Or Else…!!!!!!!!!

October 30, 2009

Bak

Recently one of our faithful GOIP Political Agents—Shelly The True Republican discovered an evil Emergent plot set up within Florida to corrupt our Pure Children. Here are the deets:

Walt Disney And Cussing Lie-berals

October 27th, 2009 | Category: Briefly Patriotic

From the very start, Walt Disney tried to “normalize” miscegenation, mor(m)onism and bestial pedophilia so I guess it was just a matter of time before his company hired a homo activist to run the whole company.

Also, I got a call from some lie-beral defeato-crat that ended up, like all of them calls do, with them cussing and profaning the name of Jesus…cuz that’s what lie-berals do.

Listen to Shelly’s podcast as well. My adoptive dad and I agree that Disney was an evil Emergent lie-bral apostate and that the Disney Corporation is  run by evil Emergent Spiritual Terrorists bent on enslaving our Pure Children and teaching them the false and socialist doctrines of liberalism. Parents for the good of our Pure Elect children Boycott anything remotely related to Disney.

Global Warming: Praise God!

October 30, 2009

global_warming

One Of Our Fine Calvinazi Members On The Cult Of Scientology

October 28, 2009

Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer

11:07AM Oct 28th 2009
I’m all for anyone leaving the so called Church of Scientology. It IS a cult. However, Paul Haggis says his reason for leaving the church is their support of Prop. 8. That would be one of the very few reasons I support this church. Homosexuals and homosexuality need to go back in the closet. They should NOT be proud of themselves. Homosexuality is a reprehensible sin. A lot of you will complain and call me names. I don’t care. I KNOW that YOU are the sinners, NOT ME!!!
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Hoofendorfer is GOIP Sturmabteilung Minister Of  The Truth War On Scientology as well as an avid gay-basher. Praise God for his outstanding service to our Holy Republican American Reich—God save der Führer, Ron Luce.