Archive for the ‘Psycho-Babel’ Category

Trump considers Sicking Lobstermen from Mars on Deep State

December 11, 2019

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Shelldrake Clorzo  pledges to pinch the Deep State with his pincers

QAnon reports on American Thinker:

Will December be the month the pincers close in on the Deep State?  Some promising storm clouds are building.  Justice Department inspector general Michael Horowitz will appear before Senator Lindsey Graham’s Judiciary Committee on December 11, with the long promised I.G. report on FISA abuse to be released December 9.The report is already being downplayed by the media, with the New York Times warning, “DOJ watchdog report expected to clear Comey, McCabe, and Strzok of bias in Trump-Russia probe.”  Okey-dokey, case closed.  The storm will be only a light breeze — at least according to their “unnamed sources” and “officials familiar with the report.” Read more: https://www.americanthinker.com/articles/2019/11/are_the_pincers_closing_on_the_deep_state.html#ixzz66pc3EPCC

It was also reported from an anonymous transmission from outer space that a UFO was spotted a few light-years from Earth. The Trump Administration has said to have made contact with the ship piloted by one Shelldrake Clorzo (a lobsterman from Mars). Shelldrake has been desperately searching for a way to avoid problems with the IRS of Mars and the unpaid millions he owes them in back taxes. He has asked Trump for help—in return and armed with a foolproof plan he pledges to sick his pincers on the Deep State to repay Trump.

Legacy: The Late Ken Silva Wanted To Rename Southern Baptist Convention newly rediscovered documents reveal

December 3, 2019

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Quote the late Ken Silva: “As one who was ordained as an SBC pastor in the mid-90s I kind of agree that a name change for the SBC would help clarify where this denomination is currently at. Filled as it is with leaders who don’t have to lead, hiding as they do behind its Idol of Autonomy, the SBC’s becoming anything goes.”
(Source: Apprising Ministries)

How dare those Southern Baptists believe in Baptist doctrine! We must most mightily put a stop to this. While we’re at it we must put a stop to the SBC’s Idol of Credobaptism as well. Anything goes in this Truth War, right? As we all know the Roman Catholic Church and the Reformers taught that Infant Baptism is the only correct way to baptize. How dare those Southern Baptists lack Doctrinal Purity in their man-centered idolatry of baptizing believers!

We must also bring back State Churches… who needs to keep religion and government separate anyways? We most greatfully thank you our late Affectionate Uncle Ken for being in the front-lines in getting our important message across that God wants America to be enslaved to theocratic tyranny. Rushdoony, David Barton and the great and all powerful Worldview Weekend couldn’t have done as great a work as he did.

We vote that we also place statues of Spurgeon and the great General and Holiest Apostle of our Truth War: our Pope of all Truth John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) in the sanctuary of every Southern Baptist church. Phil Johnson agrees and Rhoblogy adds that a statue or two of James White—“Rockstar” wouldn’t hurt as that would provide extra protection from Doctrinal corruption. Speaking of Spurgeon whom Discernmentalists love to quote from ala our late Uncle in Discernmentalism—our Research Robot Monkeys discovered that he was doctrinally impure so he might not be as great as Phil and his John, son!

Personally the ODMafia moves to change the SBC’s name to Saved By Calvinism as only Calvinism saves not Jesus.

Truth-Busters!

November 27, 2019

“When there’s a truth to be busted… who you gonna call?”

Introducing our newest film of Discernmentalized proportions Truth-Busters from GOIP Productions starring the Online Discernmentalist Mafia’s very own Truthslayer and our recent ODMU graduate

It’s gonna be tough measuring the “size of the problem” when there are thought-criminals like me who recognize that “hate crime” is nothing more than naked thought-policing. It is 100% politically motivated; it’s meant to silence dissent; and, while it has largely been successful, it has exposed the escalating Bolshevization of the Left, through both corrupted formerly credible organizations like SPLC, ADL and ACLU (all of which are now just as hysterical and partisan as the laughable John Birch Society) and hyperpartisan propaganda outlets, like Religion News Service. Meanwhile, with rightwing extremism kept in check by “watchdogs” like the aforementioned, leftwing exremism is, by comparison, allowed to flourish, so that it manifests itself all the way up to the tippy-top, with unchecked radicals in Congress proposing ridiculously out-of-touch policy positions not in alignment with more than a fraction of the country. And if these zealots on the left won’t even listen to their popular predecessor Barack Obama, why should they listen to all the other indicators that tell them they’re the ones losing their minds? Instead they cling to willful fictions like “mah hate speech”!

Oh, and Heather Heyer was looking for a fight. She got one. Her aggressor deserves to go to prison for his awful behavior, but Team Heather was just as bellicose and ideologically possessed. They are not good people. Both sides.

Truthslayer rallies the pack using his newly invented Most Obvious Right-wing Oxydizing Necrons (MORON)-Packs to put down the ghost of Shane Claiborne’s lost dog Stoner and Whiner. Later (in a cameo) El Sandi joins the team as the Truth-Busters‘ secretary. El Sandi answers a call about a perceived hate-crime (which turns out to be a prank from an escaped Whiner): “”and I know how devastating it can be to feel like you don’t even have the dignity of being a hate crime statistic.” If that is one’s focus after what they consider a hate crime, perhaps they overreacted? If you want to get beyond the “epidemic of hate” then quit looking for it. You taught your daughter to disrespect people in authority doing their jobs, don’t teach her to look for problems where there may be none, except in your insecurities. Hate is in the eye of the beholder – it is relative…good day Whiner.”

In the climax of the film the Stay Put Know-Your-Place Man a golem of the Status Quo accused of being an Antifa phantom begins to terrorize the Truth-Busters leading Lauren to exclaim: “Yes, I draw the same conclusion about the eminent threat of left-wing terrorism (or alt-left-adjacent attacks) every time there’s a new clip on YouTube of “the knockout game”. It’s really the best way to navigate through life.” In the end the Truth-Busters take down Stay Put and contain the Emergent Red-Letter Christian hordes in their Emergent Red-Letter Christian Organizers (ERCO) Containment Unit causing an environmental disaster on a Biblical scale. The end?

 

Dr. I. Todyaso of ODMafia fame called to fact check Babylon Bee

May 7, 2019

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Daily Bunker ODMs Express— Our very own Dr. I. Todyaso named Head Researcher and Fact Checker for Babylon Bee after they pledged to support us in being #1 in Absolute Truth; Alt-facts; journalism and Fake News in Discernmentalism. Quote: “We look forward to our new partnership in helping us spread our Truth War Pope’s Absolute Truth (PBUI) to more people and helping us fight the good fight in lying; slandering as well as falsely accusing others of heresy by spreading misinformation and made up quotes about them. Before the Babylon Bee there was only us and our mentor the late Ken Silva—we were lone voices in the wilderness calling out all those sliding off the True Path set before us by Calvin; purified by the Puritans and perfected by our Pope John MacArthur (PBUH). We’d like to think we taught the Bee everything we know.”—Dr. I. Todyaso of the Online Discernmentalist Mafia.

Will this match be made in heaven? We can only hope so as more people need to be exposed to the Purity of Discernmentlism’s Doctrines. Certainly the Babylon Bee and the ODMafia share the same sense of humor Doctrinal Clarity in common as this news report of theirs makes clear:

John MacArthur, pastor of Grace Community Church and president of The Master’s College and Seminary, has made a lofty promise to his congregation. He has reportedly committed to building a 20-foot thick, 30-foot high concrete wall around the entire perimeter of the church campus in order to keep out charismatics that might otherwise infiltrate their ranks.

“I will build a great wall, God willing. And I’ll build it very biblically. I will build a great, great wall all around our campus—and I’ll make the Pentecostals pay for it. Mark my words,” MacArthur was quoted as saying Friday.

—Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer for the Online Discernmentalist Mafia on Daily Bunker ODMs Express.

More on Our Persecution

April 23, 2019

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Once again my fellow Truth Warriors in our war on Truth War we’ve come under assault. This time by the sinfully ecumenical quasi-universalist semi-pelagian worldly heretical mystic seeker sensitive purpose driven Emergence unchristian against our clear teachings against such Relevant Magazine for writing an article against our Persecution Complex fake Real Persecution. Quote:

Obama was now, according to one Brietbart reporter, one of those “people who don’t want to say ‘Christians’”. “Yeah we’re actually called Christians not ‘Easter worshippers’”, sniffed a National Review writer. And so the sneaking conspiracy spread.

This is one of those “scandals” that becomes absurd as soon as you say it aloud. The charge is that former President Obama must hate Christianity so much he can’t even bring himself to say the word out loud. Such a rare form of psychological loathing that would be very surprising coming from a man who, say, famously sang “Amazing Grace” at a memorial service for Christians who were murdered in his own country while he was President.

Referring to people attending a religious service as “worshippers” is standard practice. It was only a few days ago that the AP called those mourning the closure of the Notre Dame Cathedral as “Easter Worshippers.”

How dare they take a stand against  our persecution for taking a stand against all those who would dare call Easter worshippers True Christians against our clear teachings that such is an abomination! We must reunite again in our war on Truth Truth War to come against all those who would dare come against us and be ever apprising on those who pervert our True Doctrines. Quote:

There’s a whole cottage industry built up around this complex — the God’s Not Dead franchise springs to mind — and it ends up doing real damage to Christians in other countries who are facing actual, not imagined, persecution. When American Christians cry wolf about actual persecution enough, the real thing ends up getting ignored.

And that’s the sad irony here. What happened in Sri Lanka is a true example of believers being targeted for their religious beliefs, while American Christians took a statement of seeming sincerity as a perceived slight and obfuscated the real persecution. If Christians truly care about persecution, they will mourn the real thing, not create fake versions of it.

But our Pope of our war on postmodernity Truth War (PBUH) says:

In this era of religious pluralism and postmodern relativism, evangelical Christianity has been marginalized as too rigid and too exclusive for public consumption. In the same way, the first-century church was a direct contradiction, not just of Jewish teaching, but of Roman paganism, as well. John MacArthur explains how the New Testament Christian’s life contradicted the religious norms of life in Roman society.

Because the Christians refused to make the required sacrifice offered in worship to the emperor, they were seen as traitors. They also proclaimed the kingdom of God, which caused the Romans to suspect them of plotting to overthrow the government. To avoid harassment by government officials, Christians often held their meetings in secret and at night. That heightened the Romans’ suspicions that they were hatching an anti-government plot. That Christians generally refused to serve in the Roman army also caused them to be viewed as disloyal.

The Romans also persecuted Christians for religious reasons. They allowed their subjects to worship whatever gods they liked, as long as they also worshiped the Roman gods. But Christians preached an exclusive message that there is only one God and only one way of salvation. That, coupled with their evangelistic efforts to win converts from other religions, went against the prevailing atmosphere of religious pluralism. [3] The MacArthur New Testament Commentary: John 12-21, 167-168.

The world doesn’t often clearly delineate religious lines of demarcation. To the untrained eye, most “Christian” religions look vaguely similar. And so long as the various religions can get along with one another—regardless of their differences—the world is happy to tolerate their faith and practice. Look no further than the widespread ecumenical support for this latest pope, or the constant campaign to rebrand Islam as a religion of peace as evidence of the world’s preference for postmodern religious harmony.

It’s only when God’s people make a stand for the objective, eternal truth of His Word that they find themselves in the crosshairs of an otherwise tolerant society. The message is clear: If you could just take your faith less seriously, we’d be able to get along. But the inability of God’s truth to mix with error means God’s people will always be branded as the problem children.

So who  you gonna believe us or them? So take a stand in our Conspiracy Driven Church and spread the fear and spread the hate against all those liberal sinners who said something we don’t like and hurt our feelings went against our God who is a good liberal-hating Obanma/Hillary-bashing Republican just like us because we’re so persecuted.

Smells like ‘Emergent Spirit!’

April 18, 2019

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Don’t be shocked when many “Christians” cheer the criminalization of Christianity. The number of supposedly Christian individuals whose moral compasses are calibrated to the spirit of the age rather than the authority of scripture has become astounding. 

The Emergent spirit

of this age includes:

 

  1. Attacks on the Bible’s words about CAPTALISM
  2. Ignorance of the Reformers’ PRO-CAPITALIST VIEWS
  3. Insistence on helping the poor
  4. Support of Pro-Abortionism
  5. Anti-War views/Unpatriotic behavior
  6. Anti-American Nationalism views
  7. A Pro-Social Justice bent
  8. Support of the gay agenda aka Sodomy
  9. Religious Liberty for non-Orthodox Calvinists
  10. Views against discernmentalists’ judgmentalism 

Amongst other things that are anathema to our Truth War Doctrines. 5

But most importantly this Emergent spirit is against our most Godly; Holy and Biblical President ever—-this is why we must take a stand against  them in our God’s Great Wrath and Pure Doctrines by renewing our Christian Liberty to subjugate; discriminate and persecute those against our Doctrine.

Key Discernmentalists Push Scientology Agenda

August 9, 2011

Todd Friel joins Brannon Howse and John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) in pushing the Scientology Agenda

Yes that’s right and remember in the words of the famous Scientologist Discernmentalist Tom Cruise: “Psychiatrists and psycologists are worthless and only out to take your money and have an easy job. Psycology used to be called “the study of the soul” but now its not. Only Scientology God is the answer for anyones emotional, mental problems because it comes from the soul. Secular psycology wont help.“—(MaharlikaAWA 4 days ago).

I mean would you really want to ‘promote a worldview that provides a crutch for people by making them be dependent on drugs with lots of side effects‘… I mean really? We didn’t think so either—after all even Psychologists admit that Secular Psychology and Psychiatry can’t cure anyone:

So there you go Secular Psychology never helped anyone—only devoting all of our energies in devotion to God’s Absolute Sovereign Wrath and commendable hatred towards non-hyper-Calvinists will anyone be saved, cured, healed, etc. While you’re at it please join us in our Absolute Truth War against Secular Medical Science aka Gnosticism.  And remember:

New Quick And Painless Way

June 27, 2011

To Remove Jesus From Your Heart:

Have you ever asked Jesus into your heart? What about accepting Jesus as the Lord and Savior of your life? Or receiving Jesus to fill your God-shaped hole? Is Jesus more important to you than any other religious leader? If you answered yes to any of the following—congratulations you’re not even a Real and True Christian and most likely worship Satan, the Pope or Mary as your dark lord and master a False Convert.

If you have found that you were rated a False Convert—never fear Todd Friel with Brannon Howse’s help have introduced a new quick and pain-free way to reverse your status and make sure that you become a True Convert this time around. Introducing the new surgical procedure to surgically remove Jesus from False Converts’ hearts: Operation JesuScopic Surgery! Why let Jesus fool around in your heart when you can have your heart filled with the Puritan Hard Drive (PHD)—now with twice the amount of John Owen’s fatalistic arrogance!

Fanatic for Jesus calls John MacArthur’s Jesus: “New Age.”

May 20, 2011

“All those who truly love Christ and care about the truth have a solemn duty to defend the truth by exposing and opposing these lies that masquerade as truth. If we fail in that duty because of indifference, apathy, or a craving for the approval of men, we are no less guilty than those who actively spread the lies.”

~John MacArthur, Excerpt from Unholy Trinity

Donna Martin aka Fanatic For Jesus is on record as proclaiming that the Premillennial Dispensationalist’s Christ is a “New Age” Christ:

Even-though as we all know John MacArthur the Ways of the Master himself (P. B. U. H.) believes in Premillennial Dispensationalism and the Rapture. In fact John MacArthur has stated with Absolute Certitude that “Every Self-Respecting Calvinist is a Premillennial Dispensationalist Rapture Believer” so obviously Donna Martin aka Fanatic For Jesus isn’t really a Fanatic for the True Jesus of the Bible: John MacArthur’s Jesus. Repent Donna Martin aka Fanatic For Jesus before it’s too late—for the End is nigh—don’t be a fool and get Left Behind with the unregenerate non-Elect heathen reprobates and Postmodern Unbelievers…believe in Premillennial Dispensationalism and the Rapture or Else! By the way it’s not too late to stock up on our fine and quality John MacArthur approved hand-crafted RaptureHatches before the Rapture occurs this Saturday.

John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) Will Get You Rapture Ready For Saturday!

May 19, 2011

John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) unlike Brian McLaren and his Emerging Babylonian hordes never falls prey to the winds of ear-tickling doctrines. This is because Saint John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) keeps his doctrines so Purer than anyone else’s that he can never fail at being the True Truth Warrior of Absolute Biblical Truth that he Truly is. Take the Pure Biblical Doctrine of the Rapture for instance—John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) has said: “It’s become kind of popular today, in the last two or three years, to believe in the rapture occurring at the end of the tribulation. There has been three positions, historically, “pre-trib,” “mid-trib,” and “post-trib.” What that means is the rapture occurs at the end of the tribulation: “post-tribulation;” the middle of the tribulation: “mid-tribulation;” the beginning of the tribulation: “pre-tribulation.” Now if you wanted to catalog me I would have to claim to be a “pre-tribulationist.” I believe the Church will be taken out before the tribulation.

Of course because Truth Matters, we all know that the Rapture is Pure Biblical Teaching and not a man-made invention by a deluded Scottish teenager unlike Brian McLaren’s heretical notion that the Kingdom of God is present in the world and within us. Phil Johnson and the Pyromaniacs agree as John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) has also said after being questioned about his Premillenial Dispensationalist Rapture beliefs:

Questioner: I am concern about Dispensationalism, I have been listening to Charles Swindoll, yourself and Dave Hawking, I really enjoy their ministry. And they all preach the pre-tribulation rapture, and I can buy that. I think it’s great. And then I hear some other respected men in the Lord say, “Well that is a dispensational point of view,” and they imply that that is something that has taken place within the last hundred years or so within the church. I just like to hear a little from you.

John MacArthur’s Answer: You see, that is just a label that they throw. What do you mean a dispensational point of view? The word dispensation is a NT word, Paul said “It was committed unto him the dispensation of the grace of God, dispensation of the mysteries.” It simply means a stewardship, it’s simply a term, that’s all. This is the accusation over and over again that Dispensationalism popped up with J. N. Darby, and C. I. Scofield, and all of that? But we are not working our way through a system, but rather attempting to interpret scripture on its own merit.

Ok, you have some basic things to deal with. Dispensationalism, by the way, is simply a title for theology that recognizes a literal nation Israel to be restored in the future. And recognizes a literal kingdom, and a literal tribulation, and a literal return, and a literal rapture, and that is dispensational. The other perspective is what’s called non-dispensational or covenant theology, which has no place for Israel, no kingdom in the future, and spiritualizes everything rather than making it literal.

Now, what you have to do is to go back to some very basic things. Dispensation simply means that God manages things in a certain way at a certain time. Everybody is a dispensationalist, everybody. I don’t care who they are in theology, they’re dispensational.

Elsewhere John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) has defined Every Self-Respecting Calvinist as a Premillennial Dispensationalist—in other words all True Christians are Premillenial Dispensationalist Rapture believers like John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.) and Harold Camping. We hope this helps get you Rapture Ready for the Rapture and Judgement Day this Saturday—oh and don’t forget to buy one of our handy dandy RaptureHatches to be prepared… so  don’t get Left Behind with the unregenerate non-Elect heathens… be Rapture Ready with our Final Prophet John MacArthur (P. B. U. H.).