Archive for the ‘American Jesus’ Category

Under Attack by Fictional Gay Cartoon Rats!

May 15, 2019

 

 

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Gay cartoon rats (Our Real enemies) turning kids ghey!

Now that our war with (Insert PP joke here-File Not Found) is over and we declared ourselves the winners—we can get back to focusing our discernmentalizing energies on fighting against real enemies like fictional characters such as gay cartoon rats. Yes gay cartoon rats as The Queerosexualist PC agenda has struck again our beloved Arthur threatening our hetero-marriages once again. Run…run and lock  your doors…bar your windows and hide the children. The Sanctity of our marriages are being destroyed. Our Pure marriage Doctrines are now in danger unless we come against this and forbid fictional characters from getting ghey married and exposing kids to gheybuttsecks against our Clear Teachings of it’s ickyness.

Oh the horror…the  sheer horror! I had to shield my eyes several times from the horror of that picture and out of fear of turning ghey by sight osmosis (from all the gaydiation that picture emits) while I was writing this important article. In fact Mrs. Jobson threatened to divorce me as she had thought I was looking up ghey furry porn sites—but I explained to her I was doing researchmentalism for this very urgent article that required my discernmentalism. We warned you when we already apprised you of the rabbit hole that ghey buttsecks leads to: Manimals.

You should have heeded our warning when you had the chance…now America has truly fallen since this travesty has been allowed to pollute the Purity of our airwaves. Personally Dr. Truthslayer blames the liberal Commiefied Canada’s involvement with Arthur for this assault on our Biblical marriages. Dr. I. Todyaso is now at this very moment working closely with Eric Barger inventor of Stretch Technology; Smocking Gun Technology; and co-inventor of our Gaydar on inventing a Fictional Gay Character Eraser  (Codenamed: Fig Leaf) in order to stop this menacing threat that will surely prevent us from having Hetero-marriages by turning everyone ghey.

Thankfully you have True Biblical manly-men like us to warn you of these real and present dangers contributing to the downfall of our society.

Update: [H/T]- Sadly Ken Ham beat us to the punch-line of our Discernmentalist Researchmentalism but we were working on our article first* as we are still # 1 in Discernmentalism as just like him we were totally scandalized by fiction depicting reality that we had to get this worked up about the love life of a cartoon rat all over again after having to edit in Ken’s comment:

{Edit}-

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*- Proof

Update # 2: We’ve had to repent several times from staring at the unholy horror of that picture once to edit in these updates and again to post this article. We’ve all had to spend extra time in our re-sanctification closets to wash away that disgustingly dirty pic from our minds. {Edit}- We almost questioned our manhood so we had to reread Dr. I. Todyaso’s recent sermon on the manliness of beards  several times to reassure ourselves that our manhood was still intact while we were in our re-sanctification closets.

Update # 3: Suspected Sintologist Franklin Graham has now joined our Truth War against fictional gay cartoon rats. Quote: “PBS receives government funding — why should our government be financing programming that promotes behavior the Bible says is sinful?” {Edit}- Mrs. Jobson has now threatened to go stay with my Mother-in-Law after seeing that sinful picture again in my browser but I reassured her that was the last time as I needed to finish this utmost and urgently important article soon to stop the encroaching hordes of even more fictional gay cartoon rats spawning and spreading the gheyness around. Now she knows that without us Online Discernmentalists protecting society from the sin of fictional characters no one would be safe.

STATUS QUO JOE!

May 4, 2019

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‘They call him Status Quo Joe…she was his Discernmentalist rose lost in the flow…saying sayonara made him cry…but that’s not what they meant when they said goodbye…’

Eric Barger stars as Status Quo Joe—a down on his luck heresy hunter always ready to defend the Status Quo at all costs. Joe gets called to investigate a church outside of town—running into old troubles a long the way—causing him to discernmentalize by misunderstanding that any new way of doing church leads to Roman Catholic mysticism. After seeing couches and candles—Joe becomes increasingly convinced that this Emerging church has apostatized to contemplative meditation and therefore is no longer Bible-believing. Just when Joe is about to call down the wrath of God upon this church—the ghost of John Knox appears accusing Joe of being guilty by association for reciting Apostolic Creeds and also of being a reprobate (as Joe is an Arminianist Nazarene and Arminianism is the Road Back to Rome). Tearfully Joe bids farewell to the Status Quo for now—at least until his Doctrines are considered Pure once again.

—This film features the song Tokyo Joe based on the film of the same name which ironically this movie is not based on.

 

Todd Friel’s Gospel against Peace-loving Heretics

May 2, 2019

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Good news pagan American Jesus hates you and unless you believe in our perverted Beautiful and wonderous Doctrine that pagan American Jesus hates you—He’s coming back to declare war on you apostates and kill you unregenerate reprobated sinners at any given  moment. Oh how our God hates everyone not like us with a commendable hatred and He expects us to share in His commendable hatred of all the sickos and spiritual terrorists like the Amish out there trying to pervert our Gospel of the angry Sovereign pagan American Jesus’ unsatisfied wrath since His Father sent Him to the Cross to satisfy His wrath—yet that wrath is so great it still eternally burns towards all those unlike us and not patriotic American enough. We know for as our Research Robot Monkey Sharon Whitley has said: “Calvinists in  the time of the Reformation considered the Anabaptists to be more dangerous and threatening to the Reformation and to true Biblical Christianity than Romanism.”

This is why we must refuse to compromise our Doctrine by working towards a goal of world peace as we are to ‘war a good warfare’—so remember these Pure words from our Truth War Gospels:

Blessed is the Military Industrial Complex,
for they send millions to meet their Maker.
10 Blessed are those who stifle dissent,
for they maintain control of America.

11 “Blessed are you when people praise you, laud you and say wondrous things about you for following my example. 12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in America, for in the same way they praise the rich and powerful who made America Great.

. . . . .

Crush your Enemies

38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ 39 But I say to you, do not merely resist an evildoer. If anyone strikes you on the right cheek (or is even thinking about striking you on the right cheek), strike them down. Strike down their families. Strike down their villages. Strike down their nation, so that even their descendants live in fear. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take your coat, take everything they hold dear and laugh; 41 and if anyone forces you to go one mile, force them, by any means necessary, to go one hundred miles. 42 Give to none who beg from you, for that enables laziness, and refuse anyone who wants to borrow from you, for that promotes idleness and entitlement.

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 And I say to you, despise your enemies and preemptively bomb or drone those who defy you (or defy your ally or have natural resources vital to your sense of security), 45 so that you may be children of your God; for He makes his sun rise on the good, and sends rain on the righteous while bringing darkness to the wicked and drought to the unrighteous.”

Blessed Are The Peacekeepers!

April 29, 2019

Blessed are the Peacekeepers missiles which were personally blessed by pagan American Jesus. Blessed are they who are consistently so Pro-Life it kills. Blessed are they who call for more war an end to war. Blessed are they that sew division through hate unity through love. Blessed are they who hate love their enemies. Blessed are they who hold true to Christian American values. Blessed are the peacemakers warmongers who sew war where there is no war peace where there is no peace.

Breaking News: Our Ex-Leader Deposed!

April 26, 2019

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Spreading the ODM Gospel of fear and militarism! at Ron Luce’s Battle Cry training camps for Truth Warriors.

“This is a real war… I want an attacking church.” – Ron Luce

In case you are wondering we had to renounce our ex-fuhrer for sliding into  the apostasy of the sissified Evanjellyfish weak wimpy gutless grace girlymen: “…(Ron) Luce painted himself as the victim in an interview with Christianity Today: “I guess we’re guilty of reaching as many kids as we could, thinking our business model was sound.”” You hear that weak gutless spineless response—we would expect that from crybaby liberal snowflakes but  A True Man of God in our Truth War would never feel victimized:

…I don’t know if you’re interested in boxing. It’s a…it’s far…it’s the sort of last most barbaric holdover from the past where you pound people’s brains senseless. It’s amazing with all of the things that people scream about in our society…don’t eat potato chips and things like that…that somebody doesn’t rise up and call a halt to people bashing each other’s brains in on purpose. But as brutal as it is, boxers fight with leather gloves padded to cushion the blow. You should know that, in the days of the New Testament, Greek boxers had fur-lined gloves. There was just a little fur and leather, no padding. They were made generally of ox hide. And stitched into the glove at the knuckles was lead and iron. When Paul talks about fighting the good fight, he’s talking about some serious action. And in a Greek boxing match, the loser had his eyes gouged out as emblematic of his failure.Boxing, to us, is not what it was then. It was a death/life struggle. Serious conflict from which you could emerge dead or lifetime blind. I just don’t think the church understands that. I…I met with the pastor of the largest seeker friendly church, and he said to me, “You know what your problem is MacArthur? You need to lighten up.” And I smiled. I said, “It’s really hard to do in the middle of war.” Fight the good fight. It is a good fight, isn’t it? It’s a noble fight. To fight against the kingdom of darkness with the truth. The only weapon we have is the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, right?

And I think that’s one of the serious problems today, is people aren’t taking the battle as seriously as they have to take it. And He helps us with that. “Fight the good fight of faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you are called.” What does that phrase mean? He simply means this: Get a grip on the fact that you’re dealing with eternal issues. How can you treat the ministry shallow……in shallow terms? How can you treat it trivially? This is war, and eternity is at stake. “You knew that…He says in verse 12…when you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses. You knew that when you confessed Christ, when we were all there gathered.” He’s probably referring to His ordination when the elders laid hands on Him and set Him apart from the ministry. “You confessed at that time that this was a mater of eternal issues. You’re not just slapping people around with some puffy gloves here. This is a life and death matter. Get a grip on it.”

A True Man of God would never run as we are suppose to keep up our good fight in victimizing others fighting for our Truth and the purity of our Doctrines. After all this is the Truth War and we must keep fighting so that we can feel persecuted by ourselves win the war against liberals; Emergents; globalists; socialists; Evanjellyfish and our many enemies of our Truth. What happened to the Ron who stood in the greatness of our militant dogma?  For shame—what happened to this Ron?:

BattleCry Philadelphia was more than just a vulgar carnival designed to suck donations into the coffers of Ron Luce’s corporation “Teen Mania”. Indeed, it had a point, to recruit the future elite “warriors” in the coming battle against the separation of church and state. It turned dark and frightening on Saturday afternoon. After Franklin “Islam is a Wicked Religion” Graham came out to thunder against the evils of homosexuality and the Iraqi people (whom he considers to be exactly the same people as the ancient Babylonians who enslaved the tribes of Israel and deserving, one would assume, the exact same fate) we heard an explosion. Flames shot out on stage and a team of Navy Seals was shown on the big TV monitors in full camouflage creeping forward down the hallway from the locker room with their M16s. They were hunting us, the future Christian leaders of America. Two teenage girls next to me burst into tears and even I, a jaded middle-aged male, almost jumped out of my skin. I imagined for that moment what it must have felt like to have been a teacher at Columbine high school. 10 seconds later they rushed out onstage and pointed their guns in our direction firing blanks spitting flames. About 1000 shots and bang, we were all dead.

What would our most Biblical and most Godly President ever say? What would the late great Pastor-Teacher to the Internet Congregation to the True Remnant of ODM Truth Warriors think?…in fact we already know as my co-warrior in our Truth War Dr. Itodyaso wrote the other day “he is rolling over in his grave.” Thankfully we came under the leadership of a True MAN OF GOD years ago even before Ron Luce was dethroned—who has led us to higher standards of godliness and self-righteousness in protecting our Pure Doctrines and militant dogmas—that True Man of God is the Pope of our Truth War aka John MacArthur (PBUH).

NEITHER OBAMA’S NOR TRUMP’S NSA ARE SEVERE ENOUGH… —

April 24, 2019

NSA NOT SEVERE ENOUGH Written By Ron Jobson (Don Jobson’s “Liberal” Brother) when False President Obama Bin Laden was still occupying the Oval Office “There are a bunch of people who hate (the) N.S.A.,” says Laura Blakey, (but it follows our Truth War Doctrines)….I think our Christianity offends them.” I am saddened to learn […]

Sharing my brother’s article via the ODMafia: NEITHER OBAMA’S NOR TRUMP’S NSA ARE SEVERE ENOUGH… —

More on Our Persecution

April 23, 2019

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Once again my fellow Truth Warriors in our war on Truth War we’ve come under assault. This time by the sinfully ecumenical quasi-universalist semi-pelagian worldly heretical mystic seeker sensitive purpose driven Emergence unchristian against our clear teachings against such Relevant Magazine for writing an article against our Persecution Complex fake Real Persecution. Quote:

Obama was now, according to one Brietbart reporter, one of those “people who don’t want to say ‘Christians’”. “Yeah we’re actually called Christians not ‘Easter worshippers’”, sniffed a National Review writer. And so the sneaking conspiracy spread.

This is one of those “scandals” that becomes absurd as soon as you say it aloud. The charge is that former President Obama must hate Christianity so much he can’t even bring himself to say the word out loud. Such a rare form of psychological loathing that would be very surprising coming from a man who, say, famously sang “Amazing Grace” at a memorial service for Christians who were murdered in his own country while he was President.

Referring to people attending a religious service as “worshippers” is standard practice. It was only a few days ago that the AP called those mourning the closure of the Notre Dame Cathedral as “Easter Worshippers.”

How dare they take a stand against  our persecution for taking a stand against all those who would dare call Easter worshippers True Christians against our clear teachings that such is an abomination! We must reunite again in our war on Truth Truth War to come against all those who would dare come against us and be ever apprising on those who pervert our True Doctrines. Quote:

There’s a whole cottage industry built up around this complex — the God’s Not Dead franchise springs to mind — and it ends up doing real damage to Christians in other countries who are facing actual, not imagined, persecution. When American Christians cry wolf about actual persecution enough, the real thing ends up getting ignored.

And that’s the sad irony here. What happened in Sri Lanka is a true example of believers being targeted for their religious beliefs, while American Christians took a statement of seeming sincerity as a perceived slight and obfuscated the real persecution. If Christians truly care about persecution, they will mourn the real thing, not create fake versions of it.

But our Pope of our war on postmodernity Truth War (PBUH) says:

In this era of religious pluralism and postmodern relativism, evangelical Christianity has been marginalized as too rigid and too exclusive for public consumption. In the same way, the first-century church was a direct contradiction, not just of Jewish teaching, but of Roman paganism, as well. John MacArthur explains how the New Testament Christian’s life contradicted the religious norms of life in Roman society.

Because the Christians refused to make the required sacrifice offered in worship to the emperor, they were seen as traitors. They also proclaimed the kingdom of God, which caused the Romans to suspect them of plotting to overthrow the government. To avoid harassment by government officials, Christians often held their meetings in secret and at night. That heightened the Romans’ suspicions that they were hatching an anti-government plot. That Christians generally refused to serve in the Roman army also caused them to be viewed as disloyal.

The Romans also persecuted Christians for religious reasons. They allowed their subjects to worship whatever gods they liked, as long as they also worshiped the Roman gods. But Christians preached an exclusive message that there is only one God and only one way of salvation. That, coupled with their evangelistic efforts to win converts from other religions, went against the prevailing atmosphere of religious pluralism. [3] The MacArthur New Testament Commentary: John 12-21, 167-168.

The world doesn’t often clearly delineate religious lines of demarcation. To the untrained eye, most “Christian” religions look vaguely similar. And so long as the various religions can get along with one another—regardless of their differences—the world is happy to tolerate their faith and practice. Look no further than the widespread ecumenical support for this latest pope, or the constant campaign to rebrand Islam as a religion of peace as evidence of the world’s preference for postmodern religious harmony.

It’s only when God’s people make a stand for the objective, eternal truth of His Word that they find themselves in the crosshairs of an otherwise tolerant society. The message is clear: If you could just take your faith less seriously, we’d be able to get along. But the inability of God’s truth to mix with error means God’s people will always be branded as the problem children.

So who  you gonna believe us or them? So take a stand in our Conspiracy Driven Church and spread the fear and spread the hate against all those liberal sinners who said something we don’t like and hurt our feelings went against our God who is a good liberal-hating Obanma/Hillary-bashing Republican just like us because we’re so persecuted.

Facebook Is Persecuting Us!

April 23, 2019

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Breaking Truth War News: Facebook is persecuting us. Facebook has blocked me from sharing my Blog posts and not letting me share my hate love speech with everybody on Facebook. I feel so persecuted that I just had to write a post to show just how persecuted we are for our Facebook followers. My fellow Truth Warriors Dr. I.Todyaso and Dr. Truthslayer can attest to how persecuted we are. I feel outraged and personally threatened by the intolerant librul fascism of Facebook. Why must they harass us for standing on the Hard Truths of the Bible? Why is lamestream media silent on our plight? I liken my suffering to all those Christian martyrs suffering persecution elsewhere in the world. Please help us in our good fight against persecution and the intolerance of Facebook by liking the ODMafia and GOIP pages on Facebook where you can read more posts about how persecuted we are. Each new like supports us in our cause against intolerance and persecution.

Liberals Ruin Everything!

April 21, 2019

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                             REASONS WHY LIBERALS ARE HELLBOUND JACKA*#ES:

                                                   AN ESSAY IN DISCERNMENTALISM

BY

Dr. Truthslayer, Doctor of the Ministry of Disinformation & Bible-Based Slander, Esquire

Libruls ruin everything and are a stain on the world but most importantly they’re ruining  our Great Country. They insist on taking our sacred guns away. They boo God. They don’t love war enough. They disrespect the Holy Flag that Jesus personally hand-delivered to Ronald Reagan when he sent Karl Marx to Hell. They hate Capitalism. They love socialist communism and are fascist. They support gays having the right to marry. They protest everything. They believe in social 2add4115b31c7c79cd11ebcc461b2ccb--donald-trump-quotes-god-bless-americajustice. They value science and education. They read books. They kill babies. They hate families. They are ignorant of history and our inerrant God-written Constitution. Moslems and illegals are librul. They are unpatriotic and hate America aka the Kingdom of God. They are intollerant. They refuse to obey the same Romans 13 that our Founding Fathers disobeyed by taking up arms in rebellion against England  submitting to Trump. They are jerk@$$es—among many other ungodly and horrible things we disapprove of. Quote:

Quite a shame Libruls don’t base their postmodern opinion on to the founding fathers none of whom were Muslim but on actual primary source documents and facts. There was not even a shred of mention by them about Islam especially in the Treaty of Tripoli also Thomas Jefferson never owned a Koran. I’m sick of Libruls not starting out their arguments with “feelingsbut research and facts. I don’t care how you feel about things, you don’t get to change the facts to suit your preferences, just by not posting your favorite leftist postmodern Right-Wing propaganda opinion. Truth be told the founders would are not rolling over in their graves with everything you jackasses have done the screw up this country.”—Tyrone V. Hoofendorfer

Happy Non-Pagan Easter Reprobates: Now Burn In Hell!

April 19, 2019

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Its the most satanic time of the year when millions of apostates participate in Popish Pagan Occultism against our clear Biblical Doctrines:

“Easter should not be celebrated either corporately in church or privately at home period.”—Sharon M. Whitley has spoken.

Thankfuly we  now  have the most intelligent—most Biblical President ever in the White House now who would never lead God’s True Elect astray into celebrating the blasphemous Romish idolatry of a Christ-centered Easter unlike our last Muslim President Obama. This is why all True Christians elected by God in our great sovereign hatred and discernmentalism must take a stand against this holiday of pagan Ishtar worship nonsense—beside we who truly know God know that God only honors Holy Days that celebrate America First!

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